My job keeps me travelling a lot or working long hours - this weekend I had a business trip to Chicago that put me home around 1 a.m. on Sunday. My boys were all asleep when I got home; I checked in on them and went to bed myself. They had actually been away for the last week with their Dad in Fort Myers working so it had been much longer than I wanted since I had seen them. However it was worth the wait. As each one of them woke up this morning they came in to my room, crawled in bed next to me, gave me a big hug and kiss, except for one of them; he had fallen asleep on the couch. I had gotten out of bed to talk to my sons and while we were sitting on the couch my #3 son raised his head saw it was me and smiled from ear to ear, I received another big hug and kiss and he laid his head on my lap.

My sons are 16, 15, 13, and 11 - I always worry that my sons are getting too old to show affection towards me or too busy with their friends to care that I am around but they always prove that all that worry is not and those are the times I love that they have proven me wrong. There is nothing that makes me happier than the love my children give me.

Well I just returned from vacation and what a great trip it was. I am counting down the weeks before I begin law school (4 weeks to go) and I wanted to have one big hoorah with my sons while I had the chance. So we went on a road trip with stops in Philly, NYC, and Hershey Park. There were so many high points to this trip that it is really impossible to pick a favorite adventure.

Philly has soooo much to do we spent 4 days there and probably could have spent a few more. We did the typical site seeing of the Liberty Bell and Independece Hall, we ran to the top of the Rocky Steps, had "real" Philly Cheesesteaks, Philly Zoo, Ben Franklin Science Institute and did something a little unusal and toured the Eastern State Penitentiary - what a really neat experience.Besides the history itself that was so fascinating, we did get to see Al Capone's cell from his very first stent in prison. I highly recommend to anyone who visits the Philadelphia area.

We spent a day in NYC doing the typical Statue of Liberty, Ellis Island, and TIme Square at midnight but New York City had one specific MAIN purpose - we went to a Yankees game for their final season at Yankee Stadium. Again, What a Blast! It is pretty safe to say you have not experienced a MLB game until you experience it at Yankee Stadium with 53,000+ Yankee Fans.

Hershey Park was nice too but being from Central FL kind of takes the thrill out of going to a theme park but I tell you what nothing beats straight from the factory Reese's Cups or Strawberry Twizzlers. It sounds crazy but being really fresh; made a HUGE difference in taste.

We covered a lot of territory and had a blast doing it. I made some really special memories with my sons this  summer on this trip alone. I really needed that time with them and I hope it was an experience they also will not forget.

I started this list years ago. I have slowly begun to mark items off over the years. I look forward to the day when I have done all of this and then some.

1. Write a Book

2. Get a Law Degree

3. Dance, Kiss, and Make Love in the Rain

4. Walk along the Great Wall of China

5. Own a house with view

6. Ride a Camel in the Desert

7. Go to a Yankees Game

8. Visit the Grand Canyon

9. Visit New York City

10. Visit Niagra Falls

11. Ride in a Hot Air Balloon

12. Ride the World's tallest roller coaster drop

13. Ride the Bungee Drop at the top of the Stratosphere in Las Vegas

14. Visit the Parthenon

15. Visit the Great Pyramids

16. Shower in a Waterfall

17. Join the Mile High Club in a Hot Air Balloon

18. Meet Someone Famous

19. Shake hands with the President of the U.S.

20. Visit the Alamo

21. Go to the top of the Empire State Building

22. Be at St. Andrews during The British Open

23. Attend a major sporting event (Olympics, Super Bowl, World Series)

24. See Sigrfried and Roy

25. Drive across America Coast to Coast

26. Drink Beer at Oktoberfest in Munich

27. Ride the Orient Express

28. Meet Justice Thomas

29. Meet Justice Scalia

30. Eat Sushi

31. Attend Professional hockey game

32. Attend NBA game

33. Attend NFL game

34. Attend Cowboys game in Dallas Cowboys Stadium

35. Argue a case before the U.S. Supreme Court

36. Be a judge

37. Be a politician

38. Meet the wives of the husbands I have cheated with and apologize

39. Going grocery shopping with nothing but an overcoat on

40. Speak a foreign language

41. Write a foreign language

42. Make a difference in Someone's Life

43. Watch Tiger Woods play in a tournament live

45. Complete a NY Times crossword puzzle

46. Be "That Girl" to someone

47. Fall in Love

48. Visit all the Smithsonian Museums

49. Visit a concentration camp

50. Visit Ground Zero

51. Create a web-site

52. Ride public transportation

53. Climb to the top of the Statue of Liberty

54. Go deep sea fishing and eat catch

55. Kiss someone I just met

56. Donate money to or start a scholarship fund

57. Drive convertible with music blaring

58. Get body in optimum shape

59. Grow a garden

60. Find a job I love

61. Forgive my father

62. Call in sick in the middle of the week and spend the day making love

63. Watch all the Star Wars movies in sequence

64. Watch all the Godfather movies in sequence

65. Spend an entire day reading

66. Make love under the stars

67. Sleep under the stars

68. Ask someone on a date

69. Teach someone who is illiterate to read

70. Mentor somebody

71. Learn to ballroom dance

72. Watch the launching of the Space Shuttle

73. See the Changing of the Guards at Arlington Cemetery

74. Go whitewater rafting

75. Make love on the beach

76. Have my portrait painted

77. Swim with a dolphin

78. Fly first class

79. Read the Bible cover to cover in a year

80. Make religous service a habit

81. Volunteer for a good cause

82. Own my own home

83. Be debt free

84. Go whale watching

85. Fly a kite

86. Go to Mardi Gras

87. Visit Pearl Harbor

88. Fly in a helicopter over the volcanos of Hawaii

89. Ride a horse

90. Take a year off BEFORE it is time to retire

91. Visit all 7 Continents

92. Make love in all 50 states

93. Make someone cry from happiness

94. Sit on a jury

95. Read Kama Sutra and put into practice

96. Make love in a field of flowers

97. Got ot an Aerosmith concert

98. My 15 minutes of fame

99.  Learn to relax

100. Have No Regrets....

It has been some time since I last posted a blog or bulletin. Mostly, because I have just not had the time or maybe because nothing has inspired me...UNTIL TODAY.

I have a  friend who is "cheating". (It really is a friend and not me) She has been married for more than twenty years and just recently inthe last two years has began having an affair with a married man. Both proclaim to have a "happy" marriage but something is missing from each of their marriages - that something is intimacy or rather a preferred level of intimacy. Apparently finding this intimacy with another person other than their spouses has actually made things much better at home for each of them. My personal feeling is "good for them". However, I guess I am one of her only friends that feels that way and therefore the only one she talks to about the subject.

Infidelity is not at uncommon thing. Many marriages are destroyed by actions of infidelity but I would guess that many are also saved by infidelity - it may seem crazy but I bet I am not that far off. If two people are happy in every other realm or compatible in every other realm except for intimacy, then what is the harm in filling that void somewhere else if it saves the marriage otherwise? Now I know there are many that will say what about the hurt associated when the unsuspecting spouse finds out or the numerous other risks that are involved when having an affair. First I would say that most affairs are probably not discovered. I would also argue that there are a great number of affairs that are suspected but never confronted due to a degree of responsibility for not fulfilling all of your spouse's needs or fear of losing the spouse entirely or the ever so common "Don't Ask Don't Tell" scenario. Lets look at the big picture - a marriage that lacks intimacy or any other numerous reasons there are for having affairs is already headed down a rocky path and even without the affair will most likely end in divorce after several unhappy strained years. However, with the affair that marriage may not be so strained, as is the case of my friend above, and most likely will never be found out about. So no harm - no foul.

Don't get me wrong affairs are not something that I think should be taken lightly. In my opinion I believe the affairs that cause the most trouble are the ones that were entered into blindly. Beyond the two adults having consensual sex there must be a mutual understanding of the situation. Either when one or both parties is untruthful or misleading with their expectations or when all the risks involved are not realized by one or both parties or even when one party has much more at risk than the other - all of these reasons and many more can leave too much room for trouble.

I realize that my view is an unpopular one. People are so judgmental when it comes to the matter of infidelity or when it is any issue of morality for that matter. Morals are not an absolute right or wrong. Morals are based on a personal belief system and it should not be expected that everyone will conform to the same beliefs. People do what they do for all sorts of reasons and under many circumstances.

What someone believes to be right or wrong today may change quite drastically when faced with a different set of circumstances. That brings me to my next point ... I do not subscribe to the belief of "Once a cheater always a cheater." Everything changes - people change, environments change, priorities change and love changes. Today you may have found yourself in a relationship that is lacking something, tomorrow you may find the relationship is lacking everything ... People cheat to fill a void - to make up for something that is lost. In most instances it is something that has been lost for quite some time and they have unsuccessfully been unable to get it back so they find it somewhere else. I believe it is possible through all the change that eventually you CAN find a love that isn't lacking and is the perfect fit so there is no voids to fill ... and...no reason to cheat.

I have received a lot of slack from what others describe as "condoning" cheating when that is just not the case. The only point I am trying to make is not to judge others based on it because you are on the outside looking in and we all have our own idea of what is moral. H~

From a completely naive/removed vantage point I could say that racism does not exist to any degree BUT my ex-husband has pointed out to me that I am completely the wrong color to judge this. Apparently people's racism/prejudice is just as strong, if not stronger, then it ever was. My friends experience it. My children, who are mixed, experience it. I don't understand the mentality behind racism - regardless of who it is aimed at.

I mention this topic because it has been on my mind all week.I watched a really good movie over the weekend "The Great Debaters" it is based on a true story about a debate team from a historically black college in Texas that ultimately debates against the Harvard debate team. My brief description does not give the movie justice; it is definitely a movie worth watching.  And it disturbs me when I think that all of this has happened during my lifetime. I get very emotional when I see movies like this or readd history books about the subject because I am deeply saddened that any human would be treated so cruely or rather not treated like a human at all because of their skin color. Can you imagine being the parent that had to send your child to school when desegragation was first implemented? Those children and their parents had to be so strong - I cannot imagine being that brave. I don't think I could have done it but thank God that they had the courage.

OK so I am off work until Tuesday...This is how I know that I am a work-a-holic; the first day all I do is think about the office - worry about the office rather. Uugh! I am determined to enjoy this mini vacation of mine. I need it!

So I have spent my morning getting all my paperwork finished for Law School. August will be here before I know it.

I am off ... I need to find another distraction.

I have learned a lot of lessons along the way in so many aspects of my life, particuliarly relationships. People say all the time "I wish there had been a guide book for all this" - well, even if there was we would most likely not read it and if we did read it we would not follow the instructions. Some things you just have to learn for yourself.

My first marriage started off when I was real young, 18 years old. Being a Mom myself now I cannot imagine my oldest son, who is days shy of his 16^th birthday, being anywhere close to maturing enough over the next 2 years to be married. But at the age of 18 I, like most 18 year olds, had it all figured out. There was nothing that anyone could say or do that would make me change my mind. It was my ticket out and I was going to prove everyone wrong. No matter how that marriage ended I still have 4 of the most amazing sons because of it. I cannot imagine missing out on being their Mom for anything in the world.

My ex-husband and I talk a lot about most everything. We have been divorced for over 8 years and we are best of friends but were terrible at being husband and wife. After 10 years of being married you get to know so much about the other person and having that insight can help tremendously. When it comes to current relationships it helps too...we can talk about a problem that we are having and the other one can say "You know you did that same thing when we were married and this is how it made me feel...." And it puts an entirely different perspective on things. It has been these talks along with years of maturing that has made all the difference in the world on my outlook with relationships.

My biggest lesson has been perspective...It is always amazing to see how t****eople at the same place, sharing the same life, can have two totally different views of what happened. I look at things a little differently now and to try to see things from the others point of view. It is so important to do because men and women just do not communicate the same; what is obvious to one most likely could not be any further from the other persons thought pattern.  It is not an easy thing to do and I still find myself getting upset over something that someone has done or said but I generally am able to bring myself out of it pretty quickly and think about it rationally/logically and say "OK, I can see why he feels that way"... Life is so much easier when you do not have tunnel vision.

Today is going to be a good day - just wait and see.

I was in a bad mood yesterday right from the start. I hate those days because it throws the whole day off. Negative definitely attracts negative. But today I am back to my old positive self - I just tell myself quit worrying and smile. I hope everyone has a great day!

Well the day is finally here...Commencement. I have been waiting for this day for what seems like forever. It was no easy task accomplishing a degree while working full-time and raising four boys but with hard work and a whole lot of determination I can finally say "I DID IT". WooHoo!

Now that I have closed that chapter I will have exactly 3 1/2 months to relax and become mentally prepared for law school - I am so excited that everything seems to be falling into place exactly like it should.

I cannot say that I had the greatest amount of support in doing this. I have a very successful career now that I worked very hard for and noone (including my family) could understand why I felt the need to get a college degree but when you are raising kids you have to do it by example and I could not preach college and higher education if I did not pursue it myself. So I did it and WOW I am so glad I did. Now it is on to my next dream ... being a lawyer.

I am often asked "what type of law do you want to practice?" and I have always responded with "after 18 years in the medical field the most practical would be some kind of Healthcare Law." However, I have never personally been satisfied with that response. Certainly, Healthcare Law would be practical but why change careers if it keeps me in the same field? Why not pursue a type of law that I can be passionate about? It was this question that caused me to embark on a journey of self discovery with the sole intention of figuring out what I am truly passionate about and how I can take this passion and funnel it through the practice of law. This focus or drive is deeply rooted in my childhood.

I was the oldest of five children that my mother worked around-the-clock to support. At the time of her divorce from my father she was awarded $45.00 (forty-five dollars) a week in child support. My mother had no money and little resources, as such; she was forced into being represented by the attorney provided by my father's family. The judge's reasoning when considering the child support amount was if he made it a small amount my father would pay it. Even with such a small child support award my father never paid and avoided all attempts to collect. He would quit his job, not work or avoid jobs that would report his income so his wages could not be garnished. I remember my mother attempting to take him to court to collect the child support owed but again not having any money and depending on the State of Florida Child Support Enforcement as her only resource she was not successful. My father still avoided paying child support even after being arrested.

My mother did the best that she could to always make certain that we were fed and clothed and had a roof over our heads. We were often taken in by other family members or friends but my mother did what she had to do in order for us to survive. By the age of fifteen I no longer attended school so that I could work and help support my family. Each of my siblings would eventually do the same. None of us ever completed traditional high school and higher education was never an option. However, my mother instilled in us the most important life lessons - a strong work ethic, strength to overcome adversity, and most importantly a strong sense of family.

Little did we know how important the strength to overcome adversity and strong sense of family would provide us with the tools of survival needed years later in our adult life. In August of 2004, my youngest sister, Haley, was barricaded in her home and shot by her husband twice at close range with a shotgun once in the left side of the chest and the other almost completely severed her left arm. Nothing short of a miracle my sister survived physically.

Haley's experience is heartrending but she is one of the fortunate ones. Domestic violence is such a tragic and prevalent issue. Domestic abuse comes in so many forms, not just physical violence, and can affect individuals of any race, age, gender, or economical structure. The resources available to victims are very limited and the resources that are available are so inundated that they cannot keep up. We experienced firsthand the legal barriers and lack of available resources for victims of domestic violence.
For both my mother and my sister their circumstances were a result of being uninformed about the judicial process and naive about its power to resolve vital issues in their lives.

It is the experiences that I have shared above that are the root cause of what makes me determined to become an advocate for those who need a voice, who need support or for a problem that needs reform. It is a strong sense of compassion that has lead me to determine that my passion lies in domestic law, family advocacy, and domestic abuse. It is my desire to pursue a legal education that will allow me to represent any parent in getting the appropriate support they need to raise their children or ensure the appropriate delivery of public services and legal protections within the criminal justice system afforded to domestic abuse victims. I have no delusions of grandeur and I am not setting out to change the world but I am determined to help change someone's world.

My decision to practice law and strive for change is best expressed in a writing from Bertrand Russell: "Three passions have governed my life: The longings for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of [humankind]..."

Ok I admit at one time I used to be a "COSMO Girl" - every issue was like the single woman's bible. But then one day you realize every month is the same articles just changed up a little and really do you need to know 1001 ways to blow his mind?! Well being out of the dating and sex scene for a little while I decided what the heck maybe there really are 7 Boundary pushing techniques out there that I am not aware of and I bought the latest issue. To NO surprise there really was nothing much different than the issue I read 2 years ago. Then I found it ... the 7 boundary pushing moves were all pretty basic until they started talking about tempting and teasing -- now I consider myself pretty much an expert at both ;) but there was one move in there that had me scratching my head asking WTF?!

It involves a man's penis and a SHOELACE. Now I am pretty open and unihibited when it comes to things of a sexual nature BUT... this is how it went ... wrap a shoelace around the base of his shaft and as you are going down on him tug the shoelace back and forth as though you were flossing his member - then when he starts getting really excited pull the shoestring tight and this will send him through the roof.

About the only part of THAT technique that I can relate to is "sending him hrough the roof" but I am not thinking of this in a good way. As I thought about this and thought about previous partners I could not think of one that would even let me come close to his penis with a shoestring ... then I start thinking shoestring burns and all kinds of painful ...

Am I crazy? Have I really been out of the dating scene that long? Is there any man out there that would really find this erotic and enjoyable? Is there really a woman who has tried this? PLEASE let me know....